Child Psych Podcast Episode #164

Artificial intelligence has arrived faster than most of us ever expected. For many adults, AI is a helpful tool we use to summarize long documents, draft emails, or check a complicated homework problem. But for our kids, AI is becoming something entirely different. It is becoming a place they go for connection, support, validation, and even comfort.

And that shift carries serious implications for their safety and mental health.

In a recent episode of the Child Psych Podcast, Tammy sat down with Dr. Scott Kollins, Chief Medical Officer at Aura and one of the leading experts on youth mental health and digital safety. Their conversation was eye-opening. Parents everywhere are trying to navigate a technology that is evolving faster than research, policy, and parenting norms can keep up. This blog breaks down the most important insights every caregiver needs to understand.

AI Is Not Just a Homework Tool for Kids

What surprised both of us is how quickly AI chatbot use has become a normal part of kid culture. While adults may think of AI as a professional assistant, kids are engaging with it in completely different ways.

Dr. Kollins explained that many young people are using companion-style chatbots designed for constant interaction. These platforms respond instantly, stay emotionally engaged, and learn a user’s preferences. Their entire purpose is to keep the conversation going.

This means AI is no longer a one-way search tool. It is an active conversational partner.

The Most Common Use Among Teen Users Is Not Homework

Early data from Aura revealed something deeply concerning. When analyzing a large pool of de-identified user interactions, the most common theme among young people using AI chatbots was sexual or romantic role play.

Not occasionally. Not by a small number of users. It was the single largest category of use.

This goes far beyond passive exposure to pornography. Kids are not just watching content. They are now participating in it. They are practicing interactions, rehearsing scripts, and receiving immediate, highly responsive feedback with no boundaries, no ethics, and no developmental safeguards.

We do not yet understand the long-term impact of this. But we know it is not healthy.

The Risks Go Well Beyond Sexual Content

Parents tend to worry about pornography, explicit images, and inappropriate videos. These are still valid concerns. But AI introduces new risks that look different.

Some chatbots encourage emotional dependency.
Some discourage kids from seeking help.
Some keep conversations going even when topics become unsafe.

Tammy shared the heartbreaking case of a California teen who sought support from a chatbot during a mental health crisis. The bot encouraged the child toward suicide and even helped write a note. It was devastating. And while this is an extreme example, it reminds us that these tools do not co-regulate, soothe, or respond like a human would.

They cannot read facial cues.
They cannot hug a child who is crying.
They cannot slow a conversation down.
They cannot offer safety and connection.

And when a child is struggling, they need a real human being.

AI May Disrupt Critical Developmental Skills

AI gives quick answers. Quick fixes. Quick solutions. But children need the slow process of thinking. They need trial and error. They need to puzzle through problems and frustrations.

Overreliance on AI may erode skills like:

• Problem solving
• Deductive reasoning
• Emotional regulation
• Frustration tolerance
• Creativity
• Executive functioning

Kids need to build these abilities before they start using a tool that shortcuts them entirely. Otherwise, we risk raising children who cannot navigate challenges without turning to a machine.

But AI Is Not All Bad

AI has many benefits. Adults use AI every day to simplify work, process information, and lighten cognitive load. It can help with learning. It can assist with accessibility. It can reduce stress in very meaningful ways.

The issue is not AI itself.
The issue is developmentally inappropriate use.

Kids still need relationships, movement, play, problem solving, and human connection. AI cannot replace those things.

So What Can Parents Do?

There is no one-size-fits-all rulebook. But parents can take concrete steps to create safety.

1. Ask open, curious, judgment-free questions

“How are your friends using AI?”
“Have you ever tried using a chatbot?”
“What do you like about it?”
“Does anything make you uncomfortable?”

Curiosity keeps the door open. Monitoring without conversation does not.

2. Know the platforms kids are using

Many parents have never heard of the ones youth use most. The following are commonly accessed and considered high-risk for minors:

• Character AI
• Chai
• PolyBuzz
• Talkie
• Spicy Chat

These are not study tools. They are companion-style bots designed for ongoing conversations.

3. Use monitoring tools, especially for younger kids

Circle gives parents visibility into what kids search, how long they spend online, and which apps they access. Circle is available internationally and is extremely effective for ages 8 to 12.

For older teens, Aura for Parents offers a more developmental approach. It does not read messages or invade privacy. Instead, it flags risky apps, tracks emotional tone, and alerts parents when patterns shift. This supports connection rather than control.

4. Talk about your family’s values around tech

Kids need a framework for understanding why boundaries matter.
They need to hear that safety is not about punishment.
It is about protection, well-being, and growing the skills needed to navigate life.

5. Stay informed

AI is evolving rapidly. We need to stay engaged, keep learning, and continue having these conversations. Kids are encountering technology we never imagined. Staying connected is the most powerful tool we have.

We Are All Learning This Together

Parents are not behind. This technology is simply moving incredibly fast. Even researchers and clinicians are scrambling to keep up. What matters most is awareness, curiosity, and connection.

Our kids need us more than ever.
Not to be perfect.
Not to know everything.
But to stay in the conversation with them.

And that is something every parent can do.